In Pursuit of Purity

Over the past thousands of years, one of the most mysterious wonders of the ancient and modern world is relationships.

Typically, I’m the one reading relationship blog posts—not writing them.  Having said that, it was a relationship related article that inspired me to write one!  Although I am far from being a relationship guru, I’ve learned quite a bit in my nineteen years of life.  At the very least, I’ve gained knowledge through observation and education.  In other words, my perspective of relationships is formed by my upbringing and worldview. 

For starters, let’s talk about the poor choices I made in the realm of relationships:

During my preteen/adolescent years, I sought attention like no other.  Although the attention I sought wasn’t necessarily from guys alone, I simply “dressed to impress” (and let me tell you, it was anything but impressive).  After getting over myself and the drama that followed, I began to mature.  By the time I was sixteen, I thought I could handle the responsibility of a “relationship” [insert the, “who-knows-what” for who-knows-how-long].  Needless to say, my desperation for attention and longing for love reached a boiling point.  To my dismay, a healthy desire for love quickly turned into lust.   Before I knew it, I was consumed with fantasies that surpassed boundaries I wouldn’t dare cross in reality.  Thankfully, by God’s good grace and the power of the Holy Spirit I never acted on my desires.  

To this day, I constantly recite James 1:13-15 as a reminder of the consequences that follow temptation.  The punishment for sin is death, man reaps what he sows, creation worships created things rather than the creator.  Nonetheless, “no temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it” (1 Corinthians 10:13). 

When I was going through the “who-knows-what” for who-knows-how-long, I found myself wrapped up in a “relationship” that identified who I was.  The strangest part is, since nothing became “official” I didn’t expect things to end in disappointment.  Sadly, an unofficial relationship doesn’t come with an insurance policy against broken hearts. 

Next time you find yourself in a scenario such as mine, ask yourself, “is my identity in Christ?” and “do I trust him with my whole life?”  If the answer to either of those questions is “no” (for you or the person you are interested in), perhaps now isn’t the best time to pursue a relationship.        

Although I made some poor choices in the past, I also made some good ones in the process:

1.     Make Lists.

For many of us girls, it’s a breeze to jot down a bullet point list of characteristics we seek in a husband.  In fact, some began making lists when they were nine and have been updating them ever since!  However, that’s not exactly the kind of list I’m referring to.  Back in my junior high days, I decided to begin a “husband has to” list.  Not long after writing it, I realized I wasn’t making a list of qualities for my future husband—I was making a list of qualities for my future self.  If marrying a humble man will transform me into a humble woman, than pixie dust and happy thoughts will make me fly.  Truth is, people marry as they are—not who they wish to be.  In my opinion, if you want a humble husband, you need to work on humility yourself.  Making a list of husband qualities will open your eyes to the wife qualities you need to work on now.  It’s not your job to hold men to standards you wouldn’t hold yourself to.  If a man wants to marry a virtuous woman, but lives scandalously, he will only attract scandals women.  In the same way, if a woman wishes to marry a godly man, she must seek to become a godly woman.

2.      Keep Accountable.

Listen, I cannot stress this enough: if you want to make it through your teenage and young adult years without giving into sexual temptation, you must include others.  As Christians, we have the opportunity to be a part of a body of believers who build one another up in truth and love.  Since the goal is to be like Christ, we should constantly involve others in our walk with God.  Think about it: Jesus never once carried out his mission alone.  In fact, Jesus had twelve disciples, spoke to multitudes, and ministered alongside people his entire life.  In order to live a life worthy of the calling (Ephesians 4), we can’t face trials and temptations on our own. 

Fortunately, I have a set of loving parents who know me better than anyone else.  One of the best decisions I ever made was to be 100% open and honest to my parents about my relationships with the opposite sex.  As a result, I gained two mentors that teach from their past mistakes and give advice as needed.  Although honesty and conviction sound unromantic now, purity is always worth striving for.  Hopefully, all young Christians have leaders who can keep them accountable—parents or not.

3.     Don’t Settle.

Ladies, I don’t care how much you love that special someone; if a young man is playing games with your heart and keeping you within arm’s reach, he’ll drop you the second someone better comes along.  You’ve heard it all before and if you’re like me, you’ve read plenty of articles about why you shouldn’t settle for less.  In the blog post I mentioned earlier (the one that inspired me), the writer talked about being a “second choice girl.”  Depending on the length of your attention span, I suggest reading When Did You Become a “Second Choice” Girl before continuing.

Throughout the majority of my teenage and young adulthood, I felt burdened with the feeling of being second best.  By frequently over-analyzing relationships, I became familiar with the “second choice girl” mentality.  It wasn’t long after the “who-knows-what” that I realized my self-esteem was low in all areas of my life.  Often times, I felt less valuable than other girls and—as a result—settled for less because I foolishly thought I was unworthy of more.  Reality is, constant comparison is self-demeaning, destructive, and immature.  As Theodore Roosevelt once said, “Comparison is the thief of joy.” 

Although I’m sure I could add more, I’m going to conclude with this final thought: the pursuit of purity isn’t for yourself.  Allow me to explain, if you read this whole post and walk away encouraged, that’s great.  However, the goal of purity is first for God and then for your spouse.  Chances are, you’re going to marry a guy as messed up as you are.  In fact, the chances are 1 in 1.  Thankfully, there is hope: all things are possible through God—including marriage.  Apart from God, marriage is messy and disappointing.  Although, as my mom pointed out, "even with God, marriage can be messy and disappointing at times.  God just gives us the strength and reason to stick with it if we let him."  

If the goal of marriage is happiness, chances are it will end.  As John Mark Comer points out in his book Loveology, half of marriages end in divorce (that’s a coin toss).  However, something beautiful happens when you bring two broken people together who love God and use each other as catalyst for growth. 

So young singles, remain steadfast in pursuit of purity, “Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, [and] give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you” (1 Thessalonians 5:16-18).
 

Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?

Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?
By Jessica Harvey  
March 29, 2015

     

     “Add 26 + 17 by breaking apart numbers to make a ten.  Use a number that adds with the 6 in 26 to make a 10.  Since 6 + 4 = 10, use 4.  Think: 17 = 4 + 13.  Add 26 + 4 = 30.  Add 30 + 13 = 43.  So 26 + 17 = 43” (Farmer).  Believe it or not, that is a third-grade mathematical equation.  Since its release in 2010, Common Core has standardized K-12 academics in English language arts and mathematics.  Rather than excelling in “literacy, proficiency, or increased graduation rates,” the Common Core strives to make students “college- and career- ready” (Home School Legal Defense Association).  According to a poll conducted by Gallup in May of 2013, only 62% of Americans claimed to have heard of the Common Core (Reid).  With the realization of America’s startling lack of awareness, I decided to further educate myself on the issues within Common Core.  After all, in addition to shaping students, the new standards affect parents, educators, and taxpayers alike.  Therefore, the Common Core State Standards (CCSS) should be removed from public schools.  In order to present a convincing case against Common Core, one must understand where it came from (the development), why it’s a problem (math standards), and how to fight it (advocate for reform).

     As I said, the first part of understanding the problems within Common Core, is understanding the background of it.  Common Core’s origin can be tracked all the way back to the United Nations-sponsored “World Conference on Education for All” in 1990.  During the event, world leaders from 150 countries discussed various educational goals—one of which was approved by George W. Bush: “Outcome-Based Education.”  The ultimate appeal to “Outcome-Based Education” is federal control over schooling (McManus).  Several years later, President Bush and the Department of Education released the “No Child Left Behind” (NCLB) act.  Essentially, “No Child Left Behind” sought to equalize education in classrooms by lowering the standards—a kick-starter for Common Core.  By the time 2007 rolled around, the Gates and Board Foundation had pledged $60 million towards the campaign (Pullmann).  Approximately three months after Barack Obama’s election, he bribed states through the “Race to the Top” (RTT) competition.  Before the standards were even written, “Race to the Top” offered $4.35 billion in federal grant money (in other words, our tax dollars) to any school willing to implement Common Core standards.  As author William P. Hoar of The New American put it, “The feds know how hard it is for state politicians to turn down ‘free’ money, especially in times of recession” (Hoar).  Unsurprisingly, 45 states including Washington D.C. signed the deal and took the grant money (Beck, The Whole Story on Common Core).  Since no congressional input was given, when it came time to write the new standards, there was no Congressional repeal (McManus). 

     Together, the National Governors Association (NGA) and the Council of Chief State School Officers (CCSSO), along with Achieve Inc.—“a non-profit that received millions in funding from the Bill and Melinda Gates Foundation” wrote the Common Core standards (Young).  Of the thirty members on the Common Core validation committee, only two were academic specialist: Sandra Stotsky—former Senior Associate Commissioner in Massachusetts and Jim Milgram, a mathematician and Stanford professor for 45 years.  According to Stotkey, they were “expected to say, apparently, that these standards were internationally benchmarked, they followed procedures that were appropriate, and a few other things . . .” (Reid).  Both Dr. Stotkey and Dr. Milgram, along with five other committee members, refused to sign-on.  By June 2010, the Common Core standards were officially adopted by the majority of states.

     With a fuller understanding of Common Core’s background, we can now observe some of the problems with a “one-size-fits-all” system.  Of course, the Common Core State Standards sound quite promising: “Research and evidence based,” “Clear, understandable, and consistent,” and “Based on rigorous content and the application of knowledge through higher-order thinking skills” (Common Core State Standards Initiative).  However, over the past several years, the CC Initiatives’ claims have not proven to be true.  Although Common Core certainly is “consistent” in dumbing down America, it is neither clear nor understandable.  Brian Farmer, a researcher for The John Birch Society and writer for The New American, went as far as to say, 

Three philosophical ideas appear to be an integral part of Common Core: statism, moral relativism, and progressivism. First, the statist goals of Common Core are implicit in the lockstep uniformity that is the central thesis of the program. There is a clear intention to mold people through schooling, to overthrow accepted custom and traditional values, and to weaken parental influence (Farmer).

Since the standards were initiated, many CC math problems have gained national attention.  Michael Snyder, a journalist for infowars.com, wrote, “Unfortunately, these ‘standards’ are doing to public education what Obamacare is doing to our health care system – absolutely ruining it.  Just look at how basic math instruction has changed.”  He goes on to display several images of Common Core textbook questions that are utterly ridiculous.  For instance, in a video posted at the end of his article, an Illinois Curriculum Director explains that “under Common Core, it is okay for children to say that ‘three times four equals eleven’ as long as they can give the reasons for their answer…” (Snyder). 

     Although the program promises to be “rigorous” and teach “higher thinking,” one concerned mother stated that, “it just looks tedious” (Rich).  In his co-written article, “The Common Core Math Standards,” Ze’ev Wurman, a former U.S Department of Education official and coauthor of “Common Core’s Standards Still Don’t Make the Grade,” wrote: 

No state has any reason left to aspire for first-rate standards, as all states will be judged by the same mediocre national benchmark enforced by the federal government . . . give it some time and, as sunset follows sunrise, we will see even those mediocre standards being made less demanding. This will be done in the name of “critical thinking” and “21st-century” skills, and in faraway Washington D.C., well beyond the reach of parents and most states and employers (Wurman).

In addition to confused and frustrated parents, teachers are also speaking out against Common Core.  One teacher in particular wrote, “I am teaching the traditional algorithm this year to my third graders, but was told next year with Common Core I will not be allowed to . . . I am so outraged . . . my child is not going to public schools until Common Core falls flat” (Garelick). 

     The question is, what can be done about it?  How can we advocate for reform in our state and ultimately, our country?  First of all, before change can be implemented, further education is absolutely necessary.  Be sure to study the standards carefully, along with the “connections among corporations, politicians, and education reformers” (Beck, We Will Not Conform: Action Plan).  Furthermore, share the information gathered; nothing will happen if people don’t speak up against Common Core.  Many online outlets such as social media or blogs can aid in promoting a cause.  Shane Vander Hart, an administrator and frequent writer at Truth in American Education, composed a series of steps to fight the Common Core.  Along with learning and sharing information, Vander Hart notes the importance in contacting local school boards and state legislators: “Do not assume they know what is going on.  Encourage others to do the same.”  In conclusion to his article, Vander Hart suggests one final step: Find like-minded groups.  As an example to illustrate his point, Vander Hart stated that the Indiana anti-Common Core bill passed because two moms mobilized their local tea party groups (Hart).  As Glenn Beck, a conservative political commentator, once argued on The Blaze, “If we don’t save education,” so goes the country: “parents will need to stand up and challenge their school districts and even change school districts to enact change” (Gabbay).     

     Beyond a shadow of a doubt, Common Core State Standards should be removed from public schools.  From its inception at the 1990 “World Conference on Education for All,” to its official adoption in June 2010, Common Core has nationalized mediocre, federal-led standards.  Of the 30 members on the Common Core validation committee, only 25 signed-on—none of which were academic specialist.  Evidently, Common Core never kept its promoted promises.  In addition to dumbing down America, the new math standards are neither “clear” nor “rigorous”—as the Common Core State Standards Initiative claims.  Now is the time to fight back.  People need to educate themselves, speak out against Common Core, contact local school boards, write letters to state legislators, and find like-minded groups to connect with.  Above all, parents must be directly concerned with and involved in their children’s education.  As quoted in the forty minute Common Core documentary, “Building the Machine” from the Home School Legal Defense Association (HSLDA), “Decades of research show that the single most important element in a child’s education is parental involvement. So, regardless of which side you support in the reformation of America’s schools, be involved” (Reid).